How I Left My First Marriage Part 2

By Jarlath Opara

"You think you  can eat your cake and still have it? Gone are those days you would be forming around, thinking the world revolves around you. You didn't know  how transient life can be? Up today, down tommorow.

 See!  let me tell you, I am the  one  reigning now. Those day I was answering you  sir, giving you  reverence,  in your widest imagination you thought I cared about  you? Nah! It was your money  i cared for . I have no regard for any man with a shallow financial depth. I guess you  didn't make enquiries about me before  getting married to me.

 Before  you  married me, perhaps you  weren't decerning enough to notice  traces of  feminism? You didn't see my nails? You  didn't take  note of my Brazilian hair? I guess you  never noticed my BBL and  the various piercing and tattoos around my body?

You got carried away by my hourglass shape, fine accent and  smooth skin, got deluded that such a person would be submissive to a man whose pocket is empty? You haven't seen anything yet. Better go out there  and get yourself a job, if you  still hope to  make this marriage work. 

These were the comments of my wife when I confronted her on her sudden change of behaviour not too long  I lost my job.

As I looked at her spewed all these from her gum chewing mouth, unconcerned of the mental health and the emotional wreck such would cause me, I was confused on what  else to do.

Before me were many options,  to strangle her to death , divorce her, ignore her and pretend she never  existed  or to temporary move out of the house, hoping to sort myself out soon. 

In the midst of all these emotional crunch and squeez, my family'  name and how my parents would take the news of my divorce barely one  year I wedded  was like  a big hook,  however I tried wouldn't pass through my throat.

 Sadly,  none of the options gave me peace of mind. I was  ready to condone  her excessive,  overbearing dispositions and other morally unacceptable lifestyle of hers if it could  save my fast degenerating marriage. 

I loved her, I cared for her, but she never  had any feelings  for me. I thought you  loved me? What happened to all those love and pet names you  were  calling me I asked her? Love? She quipped,  giggled, staring  at me with a deep scorn. Does love exist? Believe the existence of love in  any relationship at your peril she said,  throwing at me a glass of wine she was holding. 

 I meant  nothing  to her anymore, worthless as a straw and less reverenced than a rag. Of course love doesn't exist for you I said to her. But as for me, it does.

I didn't want to have a failed marriage. My Parents  never had failed marriage,  why would I? I was ready to ignore  her sudden  infidelity. I was ready to be turned into a house boy, doing all the chores.  I was also ready to bear her insults and barrage of imprecative remarks however hurtful. What I wasn't ready was to divorce her. 

For six months I was smiling and suffering, covering our fast failing marriage, giving out the impression that all was well when  inside my home was nothing less than hell. Though I  lost my job and was  terribly broke, Lovett my wife was loaded. She eat what she wanted to eat,  drank any kind  of choice wine and dressed however she felt like. 

Where was she getting the  money? She wasn't working, yet her lifestyle didn't suggest that. So who was funding her? Though she was hanging out with different men and sometimes she brought them to the house, who will chide her ? ( Usu nweghi onu) But the kind of men I saw her with were not the kind that  could give her the kind of money she was spending. Who actually was funding my wife loveth? 

Marriage is a package.  Whatever that was wrapped  is unknown.  It unfolds by day and the form, odor etc of ones marriage as it unwraps depends most times on money.  When the love  of money is said to be the root of all evil, though a cliche, the truth about it is unquestionable. 

Many marriages are laying prostrate with many challenges. Some with minor pains, some severe while others have cancer and failure of vital organs.  Check, the major root cause is money. 

Money comes, it goes too. Money is good it can still be destructive. When the flow of money becomes the only reason why ones marriage should thrive and blossom, such marriage is resting on a cliff, bond to have a mighty fall. Mine for months rested not only on the cliff,but on a time bomb.

Until one finds oneself in the place of loving ones  spouse genuinely, ready to go that extra mile to put smiles on their faces only to discover that in their heart, there isn't a place  for you, one  wouldn't  know  how disheartening it could be. Such was my ordeal. 

Many are in this boat of mine years ago.

 Many  marriages you  see today  are painted graves, a little opening of it, the ooze stinks.

 Who and what was drumming for my wife loveth? Her dance steps weren't  ordinary...

To be continued...